The Threshold: Standing In Between Two Worlds

Have you ever been present with the awareness of standing directly in the threshold of two worlds? It is a strange feeling, to be so conscious of a period of life that is coming to a close while waiting for the new one to fully begin. Where are we when we find ourselves here? In this sacred moment between what has been and was is yet to be?

It is particularly strange when all that is occurring in nature, at least at the time I am writing this in the Northern Hemisphere, is coming into bloom. Schedules are filling, weekends are busy, life is still continuing on, yet being in the threshold can feel more like another winter. I am watching this with clients who are heading to college later this year, people who are pregnant or have recently given birth, relationships that have ended, people who are preparing to move (like myself), and many other iterations of what this pause feels like.

Here's what might happen during this time:

• Waves of doubt, regret, confusion

• Waves of excitement, anticipation, restlessness, possibility

• Foggy inner vision (hard to see the path ahead)

• A feeling of floating

• A feeling that you are forgetting something (i.e. checking emails for no specific reason)

• Disrupted sleep

• Greater fatigue

• Feeling uninspired

• Grief

Here's the thing to remember: If we are heading somewhere we have never been before, our minds have absolutely nothing to base this off of other than experiences that will illicit similar feelings or memories, conscious or not - this is plain neuroscience. Comparing our current state of being to those around us who, for example, are in their chapter and have creativity flowing or who are clear on where they are/where they are going, is too drastic of contrast and could deepen any part of us that is struggling. It is important to remind yourself that your brain cannot predict what hasn't been experienced, and it is equally important to trust in your ability to make the decisions you can in the here and now, while knowing it is a leap. The best part about this leap? You may learn to trust yourself, find yourself feeling confident, and you may just realize how powerful you are.

For those of you who read that and said, "I can't even trust myself so how the hell am I going to get through this?" The leap is what builds the trust. Leaving the relationship that hurts builds self-respect. Leaving the job that feels misaligned creates an opening of a life path unimaginable. Choosing the college without having that "feeling" everyone talks about builds confidence. Evolving in your identity as a parent while filtering unsolicited opinions (and social media feeds) builds an inner anchor. It is not in the certainty of the choice itself, but in committing to be with ourselves through every emotional facet of it all despite any outcome, that creates the trust.

So in the wise words of one of my dearest friends, "It's hard to officially start the next chapter until you close your current one." Be here now, know that you will see again, and in the meantime, deeply honor all the ways in which your current, yet closing, chapter has served you (especially the messy parts.) In the closing you are becoming, and in the new, you will have arrived.